"in honor of tomorrow"

Everyday we live "in honor of tomorrow".
That's why we cry when someone we loves runs out of them. That's why I cry.

Everyday we live "in honor of tomorrow".
That's why we smile every night once the lights go off and our eyelids shut,  we smile for the hope that tomorrow never fails to bring. That's why I smile.

It's when I saw that fire burn away all of my memories. The ashes rising to the sky, burning my eyes, filling the air with death, filling my lungs. But meanwhile, as I stared into that blue sky filled with gray  and pieces of pictures, words, meaningless now, I couldn't help but smile. Because like those memories, I too am floating on the hope that tomorrow always brings a new day, a new idea, a new friend, and something to live for.

Today I lived for that late night walk with friends. How the air was cold against my face, waking me up from the inside out, bringing tears to my eyes. Stinging. Seeing the lights of the city, seeing the lights of the brilliant city that He built in the sky. It's these small moments that I remember that I am braver than I think, and that no matter what the circumstances I will learn to fly "in honor of tomorrow."

{Sincerely Sierra}

The Hunger Games

Well, One of the most anticipated events since graduating High School... Me and Jenna have been anticipating this even for years!!!! I wasn't able to see the movie with Jenna but my roommates were definitely a perfect alternative. The movie was fantastic!
I don't have a ton to say about it other than how much of a marker of time it is for me. It has been so many years of waiting and wondering, of sitting in the office with calee trying to guess what actor/actress was going to play which character. It seems so silly now, after those years of waiting. But this is definitely something that will mark my teenage years forever...

and may the odds be ever in your favor!!

Piece

It's hardest, right now, because no more tears will come out. I want to say something, yell it scream it. I hate feeling so contained. I want to go home more than anything else, with people who actually know me and care about me. Maybe I should just accept that I have no friends here. Right before I moved I accepted it, i accepted being alone. Just to be hurt again. It's obviously me, just like Erika said. I know that they whisper about me. After I'm gone.  It's hard to be alone, and to hear laughter right outside. Without me.
I like to be home, if i close my eyes I am so close.. i can almost believe that I am there. Where the sun shines, and my smile comes alive again. It's harder than anything to be here. That mountain in the distance, it looks familiar...

I'm sick of people looking at me like that.
Like i'm nothing but a piece of sh*t in their eyes.

Team Finnick/ Team Peeta

Blogging from Alexa's apartment...

Check


Check.

Oh yes. I changed from team peeta to team finnick. lets see how that works :)

HUNGER GAMES COMING OUT TOMORROW NIGHT!

do you feel cold and lost in desperation?

Skinny Love

I always manage to come back to writing, don't I?
I can't get away from it.

I am so sick. I found this bottle on my desk after school today, a bottle filled with my weaknesses. I can't look at it anymore, so i locked it in a box. I feel betrayed, and I don't know who to trust. I think I can see that there is nothing special about me, a girl that cant stand to open up to anyone. It makes me hate that they know me.... or think they do. I am angry because I don't know who I am to tell anyone, to show anyone, everything I am is a charade, not because I want it to be.
I am so sick of being underestimated, sick of people who are even more naive than I am. People who judge, and who make up their minds on a first glance. I'm sick of being used. I don't even make a dent.

Not one dent.

And I know that I'm not beautiful. And I know I am not who everyone thinks I am, or wants me to be. The truth is , I am empty.  When I look through my eyes, every single person is so beautiful. Then everyone goes and taints that. What is wrong with you?!  I have been without friends. And I know how to be my own. Even I wrote in my 4th grade journal about a friend named Sam, who did not have any eyes. No eyes to look into when I needed reassurance. Just a black shadow, that never did anything for herself.

Please, i'm begging everyone.

Open Your Eyes. Not Everyone Has Them.

Blank Screen

Sometimes it's nice to look at a blank screen, and a keyboard in front of you with all the letters you need to make a word, all the words you need to make a sentence, and all the sentences you need to tell your story, letting your life flow through your fingers, and being able to see it from an outside perspective. I think that is what I love about writing. I love how we have the ability to create something that can last forever.  Like how I feel like I have known Beethoven my whole life when I play Moonlight Sonata on the piano. Or how I can understand what D.H. Lawrence felt when he wrote The Rocking Horse Winner.

I love how when I run out of words, there is always someone there to put some more in for me.

Someday, maybe someone will know me, from something I left behind, and I will fill in the gaps. So that this is worth it.

I love how I can be anywhere I could imagine at anytime I want! It creates a safe haven. I want to be that safe haven. Whether people find that place in my words or my eyes, in my smile. Sometimes I get so caught up in what I will leave behind I feel that I am missing what people leave for me.

It's that feeling when you knew you did something wrong, how it is the exact opposite of the feeling when you knew you did something right. Or when you are laying in the dark at night, and a tear is on your pillow and you don't know how it got there.

It's when you can't stop smiling when someone says hello, and you secretly turn back and wish they weren't walking away. Or that happiness that swells up inside and comes out in a scream, or through water in your eyes. How emotion is in charge, and how it controls our actions. It's the feeling when you look at your hands and realize you cannot fathom all of the amazing things we can do.

It's realizing how grateful you are for that breath you just took.


Or when you are finally finished with something.


And finally starting something new.